Sunday, 1 January 2012

Sluts and slags take my job...although maybe not anymore


I hate sluts.  I really do.  They do all the same stuff I do, but less safely and they do it for free.  They threaten my very livelihood.  Pisses me off.

This is why I am very happy to hear that Russel Brand is single again.  For the past two years, he's been playing it all serious like.  But deep down he is nothing but a great big cooze hound, and he doesn't even have to pay.  Which brings me back to the topic of sluts.  Given that Mr. Brand is back on the market, and given that in his heyday he fiddled with several slags a day, he will reduce my slut competitors by a rather large margin.  This can only be good for Darla's business.  Supply and demand, baby!

Despite the doom and gloom as predicted by Le Chimp and Frau Cakeneater, I think 2012 will be a great year.