A very strange request indeed...

I had a very peculiar conversation today.

Phone goes
Me:  Hello?
Gentleman Caller: Is this Darla?
Me: Why yes!  How can I help you?
Gentleman Caller:  fapping Do you do anal fisting?
Me:  (shocked) Why yes, I would love to fist your anus!  When do you think you'd like to book?
Gentleman Caller:  Ugggggggh!  Aw yeah!  Next week sometime.
Me:  OK, that's fine.  Bye!

I have no illusions about this call.  It will never go ahead.  Sometimes my Darla sense just tingles that way.  But I did mean what I said.  If anyone genuinely wants for me to stick my fist in their pooper (and NOT, I repeat, NOT the other way round), that is fine with me. 

But hold on.  Mini Darla has appeared and she is not happy.

Mini Darla reminds me that her name is Mini Darla, not Lemmiwinks.  She is still pissed off about having stared in Borat as "The Fist" and never having received proper compensation.  Mini Darla has decreed that she will set up a tent in my incall flat and not use deodorant for a whole week if her working conditions deteriorate to the level this client wants.  As long as Mini Darla is kept manicured and moisturised, she is happy to give massages, tweak  nipples and even play with willies, but she is not willing to go digging for mud monkeys nor is she willing to embark on quests to slay fudge dragons.  . 

Since I do not control my duo partner for gain, and since I do not want to have to deal with civil disobedience in my incall flat, I have agreed to Mini Darla's terms and will not send her boldly where no man has gone before.  Fair's fair.